Dating/Sex 1423239_92948945

Published on November 17th, 2013 | by Sveten


10 Things You Shouldn’t Say While Having Sex

Whether it’s the girl next door, some chick you just met at a bar, your wife, or your girlfriend, sex is a very intimate experience. So, when you’re in your bedroom, it is important to make sure you don’t say anything that could ruin the mood, or even worse – turn them off so badly, that she doesn’t want to sleep with you again. There are things women simply do not want to hear in bed. It’s simple, if you don’t know what to say, keep your mouth shut.

But wait! I read somewhere that talking about sex leads to better sex!

Okay, you got us. Some studies have proved that talking about sex during the act leads to better sex. The study found that persons who communicated about sex while having sex were more likely to be satisfied under the sheets. From little things like letting her know what feels good, to helping them find your hot spots are easy ways to be open during sex.

In no particular order, here are the top 10 things you should avoid saying in the sack:

1.   “Not like that.”

Girls don’t like to be told that their “skills” are below par in the act, it’s not sexy nor is it encouraging. You should always talk about what you DO like instead of what you do not. If, however, there are things which make you really uncomfortable, you should discuss it, just not while having sex. How you say things to each other can make a huge difference in your performance and sexual confidence.

2.   “[Person from past] used to love it when I…”

All women are different. Not two women are the same, which means not everyone will have the same sexual preferences when it comes to doing a particular thing. You shouldn’t rely so heavily on past experiences. Who’s to say that the previous women didn’t fake it to get you off quicker? Also, bringing up past encounters can drive a women crazy. She’ll feel threatened and jealous at the same time, and that, in most books, is a deal breaker.

3.   “I have to leave by [time].”

Giving her the sense of your fling being, well, a fling, can be a major mood killer. However, even if you genuinely have to leave at a certain time, you should wait until afterward to tell her. Time constraints can be very straining, and women being women, saying things like that can arouse various thoughts they’d rather not think.

4.   “I wish you had bigger boobs/a bigger ass.”

UH, NO. Women are really insecure about their bodies, society being the way it is in these times. If you’re not a model, you’re ugly. Women are also most vulnerable when they’re naked. Pointing out that there’s something about them that you would want to change, or something you do not like is a big turn off. This will not only kill her mood, but also you’re chances for the future. Instead, you should focus on what she does have that turns you on, and compliment her on it.

5.   “Did you come yet?”

An orgasm does not define good sex, or bad sex. Also, sex isn’t a race. Most sex doesn’t lead to an orgasm for the female, and that’s okay. Not only does asking her this put more pressure on her (making it even more hard for her to come, but also she has to now thing of a way of saying no, without offending you.

Let’s be honest, orgasms can be beautiful, but they shouldn’t ever be your end goal. This will only lead to disappointment in yourself and your performance.

6.   “Wait, this call is important”

Anything along the lines of you having to respond to something on a cell phone, be it a text message, e-mail, or a phone call can be a major turn off. No one wants to hear that there are more important things a partner would want to do in that moment than have sex with them. No matter what the case situation is, put the phone away.

7.   “Jessica, no wait, it’s Jasmine! “

Do your homework, man. It may not matter to everyone, but it’s kind of important to remember the person’s name that you’re having sex with. Instead of trying to guess her name, call her something else like Love or Babe, until you get a chance to discover her name.

8.   “My ex was better”

Not only is this extremely mean and rude, but bringing up your ex-girlfriend at any time is not a good idea, especially while having sex.

9.   “Do you smell that?”

Body odor is a leading issue for low self-esteem. For anyone who is body conscious, having sex is a big thing. Commenting on their odor isn’t appropriate. I’m sure they know as much as you do, and they’re trying their hardest to do something about it. If it truly is a big issue, you should bring it up some other time.

10.  “This used to be fun”

If you say this, you should write a book, 101 Ways to Effectively Kill the Mood. Instead of making her feel like she’s doing something wrong, you should take a stand and try and change what’s going on under the sheets. Try a new position. Try something new. Just don’t EVER say this.

For a woman, hearing any of the things mentioned, along with these things, is nothing but a major turn off. This is the female equivalent of hearing, “Is it in yet?” or “My ex-boyfriend was bigger.” When it comes to verbal communication between the sheets, there’s a distinct difference between dirty talk and phrases that should never, ever be uttered in bed. So, be careful.

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